Soooo, yeah, I watched Glee but then flipped channels to watch The River. Heh, I feel like every time I hear, say or type "The River" there should be a creepy "Oooooo" behind it. But now is not the time to talk about The River (Ooooooo). No, now is the time to be filled with Glee. I wonder what the Spanish word for "glee" is. Anyone?
Didja watch Glee "The Spanish Teacher?" If you had you woulda seen:
- Ricky Martin!!! He's sexy and he knows it but I'll get to that.
- This episode could have also been titled, "The One Where the Writers Remember Schue has an actual teaching job at McKinley High. He is way out of touch and someone has lodged a complaint. In order to get the coveted tenure position he must work a bit harder. Principal Figgins suggestion? LEARN SPANISH! Wow. So Schue goes to a night class taught by uber-sexy Ricky Martin. Ricky's character, David, used to be a teeth model but wanted more for his life so he got a job teaching a Spanish night class.
- Sue tries to convince the guys to sell their, uh, product at the local sperm bank because she didn't like the looks of the losers who were there. She's on the hunt for a decent donor and asks Schue! But she hates him! She later explains to Emma that she admires his ability to be a good guy and remain eternally optimistic no matter how awful she is to him. Nene Leakes is back and is on Sue's case about the Cheerios and then about being a mother.
- Having been inspired by a Spanish teacher who can actually speak Spanish, Schue decides to make it "Latin Week" and tells the kids they need to find song choices in Spanish, or written by a Spanish artist or translated or something. Ricky shows up to get things going and sings a Spanglish version of "Sexy and I Know It." I downloaded it.
- Mercedes and Sam go to Emma for some help. She feels guilty for kissing Sam and they need some advice. Emma whips out one of her new pamphlets and tells them to spend a week apart with no communication. After the week they'll have a better grasp on their true feelings for one another. After a chat with Rachel and Kurt about Rachel's engagement to Finn, Mercedes singe "Don't Wanna Lose You" and I download it. The boys sing a mash-up of "Bamboleo/Hero" and it's forgettable. The song is. The weird, "Mexican hipster boots" and bolo ties are unforgettable in a very bad way.
- Will is busy trying to translate his song into Spanish and gets very short tempered with Emma and her pamphlets. I want to smack him but then I remember he makes everything about him and wonder why Emma doesn't remember this.
- Ricky's back and singing "La Isla Bonita" with Santana and I download it. They would have the hottest babies, y'all. Seriously.
- Then it's Schue's turn. He's in a matador get-up and is being backed by a mariachi band. He sings a Spanglish version of "A Little Less Conversation" and I do not download it. He even gets Brittany and Mike to dance around like bulls. It's strange. Santana agrees with me and calls him on all his lame Spanish stereotypes and total lack of passion for teaching anything besides the glee club. It's a good thing Emma is passionate about her pamphlets. One (Taint Misbehaving. Ew.) is so successful that boys in locker rooms all over the state of Ohio are learning how to wash their, uh, area.
- Schue hands his job as the Spanish teacher over to Ricky (it's just that easy in TVland) and applies for the position as the new history teacher. He watches the History Channel so I'm sure that'll go well. All I care about is that maybe Senor Hottie will be around more.
- Oh and Mercedes is happily reunited with Sam for about 15 seconds before she goes off to lunch with her actual boyfriend. Huh?
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