Instead of opening on that phone call Rick received in the boiler room, because that’s what we all wanted, the show opens on Merle in the woods with some of the expendables from Woodbury. They’re tracking Michonne thereby confirming her theory that no one ever actually leaves that place. They find a pile of walker bodies and realize Michonne has left them a neat little message to “GO Back.” She actually shaped two walkers into a "G" and "O" and if I were at home watching I would have taken my own screencap. Anyway, Merle coins it a “bitergram” and that’s pretty dang funny. One of Merle’s group is being a bit wussy about tracking Michonne so Merle gives him a pep talk only he can (the dude must have felt a little threatened after). Merle then taunts Michonne who comes flying out of the trees and kills two of the dudes leaving Wussy wounded and Merle pissed off that all he did was wing her.
The woman on the phone with Rick won’t say where she is “for safety reasons” but disclose that “it’s away…from them.” Rick pleads and pleads for her and her group to take them in. She promises to call him back in two hours and hangs up. Meanwhile the folks in C-block are hanging out when Rick makes an appearance, gets an update on the goings on and takes off again. He is expecting a call, afterall.
Back in the woods with Merle (there’s a reality show there, somewhere), he’s expressing his desire to get back to Woodbury because the ruckus with Michonne would have drawn attention from local walkers. Speaking of Woodbury, the Governor and Andrea are talking and she’s still upset about ‘biter arena.’ However, she’s not sooo upset that she can’t help out around town. Specifically she’d like to get up on the wall to keep her shooting skills sharp. The Governor is amenable and promises to get her trained up with a bow and arrow.
Rick gets that second call but this time it’s a man who asks him lots of personal questions like how many people Rick has killed. He wants details too and this is when I make up my mind about what’s really going on with these calls. He wants Rick to not only re-visit his kills but how his wife died, the latter Rick refuses so the guy hangs up. Rick’s suspicious, though, because he never mentioned his wife dying to the woman on the phone.
Andrea is on the wall with a girl who is going to train her to shoot with a bow. If they mentioned this chick’s name I missed it so we’re going to call her Katniss. A walker shambles up to the wall so Katniss aims and…misses. Twice. Geeze, Andrea, don’t let her train you. Andrea decides to jump the wall and take care of the guy up close and personal. This pisses Katniss off and she whines about how they’re not supposed to go over the wall. The part she doesn’t voice but that was an understood was how she’s going to tell the Governor on Andrea. I suspect Andrea will escape with a slap on the wrist because my guess is that Katniss doesn’t share special Scotch time with Governor Phil.
Apparently Rick is living in the boiler room now so Hershel decides to visit him in his new digs. They chat and Hershel tries to get Rick to forgive himself. Instead Rick tells him about the phone call. Hershel does what we all would have done and picks up the receiver. We can’t hear if there’s a dial tone but it’s not needed is it? Don’t we all suspect the same thing at this point? Hershel hangs the phone up and offers to stay with Rick in his new place but, of course, Rick refuses.
Merle and Wussy run into Michonne again. They tussle and end up on the ground when some more walkers shamble up. Michonne gets one in the gut and is consequently covered in his innerds. Yum. She takes off again and the game continues.
Daryl, Carl and Oscar are patrolling the prison and Daryl tells Carl a story from his very happy childhood. His mom was a smoker and often did it in bed. She burned herself and the house right down to the ashes. Carl sees his story and raises with, “I shot my mom.” I’d say Carl wins that hand of who has/had a worse childhood. Plus Carl’s got the ace of his childhood happening during the zombie apocalypse.
Andrea visits the Governor for her scolding. They move past it and she admits that she kind of did enjoy ‘biter arena’ but he already knew that. He also knows that she kind of likes him a little or at least that he’s growing on her. Meanwhile, according to Merle, Michonne is headed to the ‘red zone’ so she’s as good as dead so there’s no need to chase after her and actually kill her. This doesn’t sit well with Wussy who thinks they should tell the Governor the truth. Silly Wussy, never disagree with Merle…who shoots Wussy for doing so. Michonne is hurt and covered in walker goo but gets completely ignored by passing walkers who mistake her for one of their own.
Rick gets another call and it’s a woman. She tries to get him to talk and uses his name, which he knows he never gave her. Rick is crazy, y'all!
Michonne happens upon an abandoned town and, wouldn’t you know, Gleggie show up in that very same town! They get out of their vehicle, kiss a bit (AWWW!) and then bust into a store. I jump when a flock of birds fly out but other than that this has been a jump-free episode. Michonne watches from a safe distance as they hit the formula jackpot along with some other canned goods. It seems like it’ll be a relatively painless trip to the store until stupid Merle shows up. And even though Glenn recognizes him, everyone keeps their guns drawn on each other (totally reminding me of that skit from SNL this past weekend). Merle only wants to know if his brother is alive, which Glenn confirms for him. Merle wants to be taken to him but Glenn comes up with a reasonable compromise (Merle to wait there while Glenn sends Daryl back). Too bad Merle isn’t exactly reasonable. He gets the upper hand on Maggie and forces Glenn to drive them back to Woodbury, thus setting up a combined storyline.
But before there’s a story merge there’s still more of this week’s show left. Daryl, Carl and Oscar find a wandering walker with Carol’s knife in his neck (apparently her aim was a bit off). The phone in the boiler room is ringing again and this time it’s Lori. Rick’s been talking to ghosts the whole time. He tells her he loved her and about a deal he had made with himself about keeping Lori (plus Carl and the baby) alive. He cries but the connection goes wonky and Lori is gone, hopefully leaving him with a bit of closure. Because if you’re going to have a psychotic break after your son shoots your wife so she doesn’t turn into a zombie after dying from giving birth to your baby, closure is a good thing.
Post-special Scotch time and apparently post-coitus, Andrea and the Governor are in bed. There’s a knock at the door (apparently the Governor forgot to put a sock on the handle) and it’s Merle. Natch. He catches the Governor on his day (it was a big one) including lying about Michonne’s status of being alive. Too bad Merle doesn’t have her head or katana to prove it. This will come back to haunt you, Merle. He does have Gleggie, though and this intrigues the governor.
Rick rejoins the C-block crew and even acknowledges his baby girl. Awww. He even holds her in that Lion King kind of way and kisses her head. Double awww! We catch up with Daryl who is conflicted about Carol’s knife I guess when he finds her alive and carries her to (relative) safety. Out in the prison yard, Rick spots something in the distance and hands baby ass-kicker off to Carl. I chant, “Please be Michonne. Please be Michonne.” And it’s Michonne. She’s surrounded by walkers, which stumps Rick a bit and the episode ends.